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Worried about self harm?
Don’t keep it to yourself. It is possible to get help. That’s the experience of Jemma, Bethan, Rose, Jane, Megan and Stacy from The Amber Project in Cardiff. The Amber Project works with young people aged 16-25 who have experience of self-harm. The girls have the following advice for sufferers and their friends.
Q: One of my friends has just told me that they are self-harming. What should I do?
“Be supportive because it has taken your friend a lot of courage
to confide in you.”
Jemma
“Don’t panic. Listen to your friend but don’t take responsibility
for her. It isn’t your job to make her stop.”
Bethan
“Don’t be judgemental. Don’t get angry. Be patient.
Try not to constantly focus on it. Be there to listen. It’s not gossip,
it doesn’t need spreading about.”
Rose
“Talk quietly to them and say you will keep an eye on them. Confide
in a doctor or support group. Be a friend who is prepared to listen.”
Jane
“Listen to them. Encourage them to contact [an organisation like]
The Amber Project.”
Megan
“Don’t try to take on the problem yourself, listen to your
friend and encourage them to get help and talk to an adult that they can
trust.”
Stacy
Q: What advice would you give to a girl who is self-harming?
“Try and tell someone you trust about it, if you can. Try to remember
to look after yourself. Make a first aid box and keep it stocked up regularly.
Use it to avoid cuts getting infected.”
Jemma
“Get professional help, even though it’s scary. Talk to someone
you can trust like a teacher or GP.”
Bethan
“Be careful. Always get medical help if you are worried about a
wound. AND don’t be ashamed you are not alone.”
Rose
“Talk to someone if you feel that [things are starting] to get out
of control. Help early on might stop real difficulties occurring later.”
Jane
“To talk to someone you can trust.”
Megan
“You are not alone and you can get help.”
Stacy
The Amber Project is supported by the Church Army and the Welsh Assembly Government. The names given are not the girls’ real names.
Organisations providing help
If you, or a friend, are struggling with this issue, you can speak to a teacher or a youth worker or your doctor and ask for help. The following organisations or phone lines can provide more information or support if you need to talk to someone urgently.
Childline: call 0800 1111 to
speak to someone for free and in confidence 24-7. www.childline.org.uk
National Children’s Bureau self-harm website: www.selfharm.org.uk
Want someone to pray?
Why not ask a church youth leader. UCB runs a confidential prayer phoneline
on 0845 456 7729. The Catholic Church also runs a number of SOS Prayer-lines.
Google for options.